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Music for Adverts

Some records should be reviewed with just a sound, thus saving precious time and energy and starving the music of publicity. The whole back catalogue of Geri Haliwell for instance could easily be encapsulated by the sound of a particularly heavy footed heifer galloping around in a tin enclosure desperately trying to draw attention to itself through a series of ever more pathetic vocal belches. U2 would simple be a pigs bladder intermittently wheezing out a stale noxious odour. This record would be the sound of the dying gasps of someone bending over backwards to the point of snapping their spine. Morcheeba here have released a record that is so compromised it makes Geoff Hoon look like a paradigm of integrity.

The unpardonable sin they have committed is to make a calculated attempt to muscle in on the "music as decoration" market. Aiming their sights firmly at people who aren't really that interested in music and see it as something that's on equal footing with wallpaper or carpeting, they have come up with a carbon copy of the bland as sand queen: Dido. It'll no doubt be coming to your attention via an advert in the not too distant future.

Remixes come in the form of a predictably soul destroying trance version by someone called Solasso and a abominable Euro Pop version by Super Discount who really should know better.