Relax, Relapse

This is one of the most monotonous CD's I have ever listened to; I hear voices of old men, I hear choirs, I hear dance ambient beats, it's all the makings of some LSD fueled bad trip. But no, I was wrong apparently this isn't one big joke and this isn't a song, I'm not smoking some type of contraband, it's a lyric that is chanted and pummelled into your head like a bad, bad mobile phone ringtone advert.

Track three isn't as horrifyingly bleep-bloopy as the first two, and I begin to hear words, real sentences. The vocalist is intelligent and he has a very quaint raspy voice, it's all very American prairie farmer meeting his guardian angel family movie type stuff, and it might be cute, it could be sweet, but for the love of all things holy, that church choir is just so, so very annoying. Track four is where this starts to get even weirder I now hear a Ludacris style deep voiced men telling me to "Give It More", I begin to wonder whether maybe the CD is skipping or if there's some type of subliminal message in this that they're trying to ingrain into my brain, do they want me to join the army? Buy the album? Lose my mind? No. They want me to "Give It More", then just when you don't think it can get any better an odd heavy wind noise comes about and lingers before I'm told to "Give It More" again, and again, and again. It never ends, and there are still two tracks to go.

I now enter a trance like state where I realise I may never leave; the next two songs have a combined running time of oh, twelve minutes, I think my head is pulsing, wait, this is the same forsaken song as one and two, but it's track five.

Finally track six, I hear cowbell and some groovy 50's tune, I'm getting excited...it's another remix but it doesn't suck. Better. I breathe a sigh of relief as silence washes over my ears, there might just be some one up there who likes me.

I would never buy this CD, I would never listen to it again, it is just one of those CD's I will never, ever "get". Let's just leave this at the very, very bottom of the pile.