11

'Ere comes the old bill

I used to have a biology teacher that used to tell us that we knew we had started out on our aging and maturing process from young buck to old fart, when you could name the years on Simon Bate's Golden Years (Legendary part of Radio 1 in the 80's, kicking off at 9am and with Our Tune at 11am), every radio station has a cheap copy these days, was the start of the process. The transition would be completed when not only could you reminisce about your teenage years, they would seem better than today, but you would be able to remember the record shop (I can) you used, and what format you bought your music in, vinyl or cassette (kids ask your grandparents). She said you would really be able to tell things had ben completed when you could say how many hits bands had or why they broke up and under what terms. Even laugh at the programmes on tele like Minder and Top of The Pops (required watching) and Saturday mornings were for TISWAS. Ahhhhh Spit the dog and the Phantom Flan Flinger..............Sally James, oh and that wanker Chris Tarrant.

Well I remember The Police spliting back in 1983 and believe me it was not on friendly terms , put in a room they would have happily killed each other. Sting went on to have eight hour tantric sex sessions and the odd hit like 'Englishman In New York', the others, well who really gives a stuff??

Well The Police are back with a new tour and they can actually be in the same room as each other as well as the stage. To back up the tour they haven't released a new single or anything stupid like that - nope they have released their Greatest Hits, a nice double album full of thirty tunes, an album full of memories good and bad. What I do find hard to believe is that it is THIRTY years since they hit the record shops for the first time with 'Fall Out' which is the first track on the album.

All the old hits are on the album so there is definately something for everyone including one of my favourites 'Reggatta De Blanc'.'Roxanne' appears along with the deoderant song 'Don't Stand So Close To Me', 'Message In A Bottle' sounds as good as it did back in the day when I had hair and a waist line I was proud of.

Now that my transition from young buck to old fart is now complete, I have my hearing aid in, the album of hits brings back so many great tunes that my shrinking memory full of broken biscuits had forgotten about. Go on make an old man happy .............. and I don't mean Sting!